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110 They Like Me

Updated: 08/13/2017
 
   Do YOU really NEED everyone to like YOU?   Not at all.
   There is a belief this is a need to be loved more than
   liked. Some won't love you because you have some trait,
   skill, look, way, or appeal they don't.  Welcome to life.

   What we do need is to understand how to "get along"
   with people despite differences of politics, religion, and
   who makes the best hamburger in the world. Accept you
   for what you are and build from there and people will
   begin to like you for what makes you special ... YOU.

   
To "live in your own skin" happily, many
   things are needed, including getting past a
   perception people have to "Like" you for
   you to be happy or successful.  So
   consider 
an age-old secret:
       Be
responsible, be accountable,
       be 
professionalbe you.
   All the rest of the nonsense people get
   worried over seem not to matter after that.

   We still need to get along with others to be successful in our own minds and in the
   opinion of those who matter to us - our family, friends, most of our colleagues, some
   to most of the people where we work, people we socialize with, people we work with
   to help others, people we attend church with, and on and on and on.  Be seen as a
   person of integrity, of honor, someone who lives up to their word and always is seen
   simply doing the right thing. That's not just "a like", but respect you are receiving.


    You want to be respected, but you’re not sure how this whole thing works. The key here
    is to stop focusing on you, and start thinking about others. How can you help others?
    How can you inspire change, growth, and innovation? When you think about the people
    you respect deeply, what do they do differently from the average person? While you’re
    thinking about that, here are some of my own tips:


    How to be Liked  |  WikiHow.com
    Article includes illustrations for each tip/guidance provided. There are three sections to
    this article which include:
       1.  Getting in the Zone
       2.  Being a Conversational Ninja
       3.  Mastering the Skills
       4.  Community Q&A


    How to Overcome the Need to Be Liked  |  HuffPost, Mercedes Maidana                                            12/03/2014
    Do you ever feel stuck in your life because you want to do something new, but are afraid
    of how others will perceive you? 
I have a client who is eager to change her career path, but
    she feels that if she does, the people she works with in her current industry will think less
    of her. She believes they will think she failed in her current career and that she is not good
    enough to do what she wants to do now.
    I have another client who has trouble marketing her business because she is worried about
    what those who are currently doing better than her in that field will think of her.
    So what have these two women done? Nothing.
    They are stuck in situations they don’t like because the fear of not being liked by others is
    controlling their lives.
  


   Stop Trying to Be Liked and Start Being You  |  Lifehack, Craig Harper    
   I don’t like you.
    Four words we hate to hear. For some reason, we all like to be liked. No revelation there.
    It’s how we’re wired. We hate it when people don’t like us – even people we don’t really
    know. Some of us will do almost anything to be liked. We love to please, even at the
    expense of our own happiness, values, beliefs and standards. We compromise ourselves
    a hundred ways and turn ourselves inside-out trying to make others like us, but in that
    approval-seeking process we often forget who we are and wind up being disliked by the
    one person whose opinion should matter the most; us.
    Newsflash 1: Some people aren’t gonna like you.
    Newsflash 2: That’s okay.

   Two Snap Judgments People Make When They First Meet You
       |  Linkedin, Dr. Travis Bradberry                                                                                                                                            07/10/2017
    Amy Cuddy, a psychologist at the Harvard Business School, has been studying first 
    impressions for more than a decade. She and her colleagues found that we make snap
    judgments about other people that answer two primary questions:
      - Can I trust this person?
      - Can I respect this person’s capabilities?
    According to Cuddy’s research, 80% to 90% of a first impression is based on these two
    traits. Subconsciously, you and the people you meet are asking yourselves, “Can I trust
    that this person has good intentions toward me?” and “Is this person capable?”
  
    [Under TED Videos, we have links to Amy Cuddy's presentations for your benefit.]